The Single Change That Worked: The Way I Conquered After-Work Tension Via an Unexpected Discovery in the Loft

I often feel as tense as a wound-up clock once the workday ends. My shoulders grow tense, my breath turns fast and shallow. Typically, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.

Later, several months back, I came across an old school recorder belonging to my grown son in the attic. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time it was the bane of my life – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head long after he slept.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and got a fingering guide on paper. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, and was thrilled when I managed to knock out a passable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son questioned my actions (and please could I stop), but I kept going – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. My inability to remember anything meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breath calmed, I was focused, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Today, after some months, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a passable Ode to Joy. Sure, my rhythm is off, and I must jot down note names, but to me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it is simply about the pleasure it brings and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, as well as my son’s.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I escape into my own realm. And afterwards, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends find it amusing, yet a therapist friend informed me I was not only lowering my stress levels, but improving my cognitive skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. For daily wellness, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.